I Won’t Let My Husband Be a Birth Partner for His BFF, He’s Married — Not on Call for Single Moms

My husband and I, married for 10 years, tried for a child for seven, but I’m infertile. We grieved, or so I thought. His childhood friend, Leah (34F), always close, is now pregnant and alone, the father having left. Weeks from her due date, she asked my husband to be her birth partner and, shockingly, to be listed as the father on the birth certificate, claiming it’s his only chance to be a dad. I said no—this affects our marriage profoundly. He called me selfish, bitter about my infertility, and said he’s already promised to be there for her delivery. Leah sent a

manipulative voice message, sobbing, saying I should understand her longing for a child and let him “have this.” She even suggested she’d later claim the baby’s dad died to minimize the issue. I was furious, told her not to contact me, and warned my husband that signing the certificate means he’s choosing her over our marriage. He says I’m giving ultimatums, forcing him to choose between a “helpless baby” and a wife who “resents motherhood.” I don’t resent motherhood—I resent being sidelined while he plays father to her child. Am I wrong to feel manipulated and to fear the legal and emotional ties this creates?